We sit down with legendary drag performer, Mayhem Miller, to talk about mental health
What support did you need as a queer child? As a queer child I would say I was always supported. Growing up in a religious family in a conservative town wasn’t easy because my feelings contradicted my environment. But I don’t fault anyone because it was a different time. I always felt loved and supported. I eventually found my path.
How do you take care of yourself? How does drag play into your self care? Omg lol. Drag plays a huge roll in my self care routines. Drag is my career and source of income. I’m a workaholic and rarely turn down a gig. As much as I like to entertain, I had to learn the hard way that you can’t be the best if you’re not feeling your best. Forcefully, I have to check in with my body and my mind. Silence the noise and get still with myself. When you’re constantly going it’s hard to know when you need a break. Mondays are a mandatory day off. That’s when I catch up on sleep and have my “self date” day. Lunch, a movie, dinner, a massage, a pedi. shopping for “Dequan” not Mayhem. I make sure to treat myself good for all the hard work I put in. I try to plan little get away or trips to unplug. I have to remember the character I created isn’t the only thing about me that should have all focus and attention. My true self deserves time to enjoy the fruits of my labor.
Looking back at your childhood, how has drag played into your development? I was always supposed to be an entertainer. I remember always loving the stage and showing off for anyone who would watch me. Secretly playing in my grandmothers wigs and jewelry, my mom’s heels lol. Drag has always been with me. It just took adulthood to come in order for me to truly blossom into the queen I always was.
How did your queerness play a role in your development? Being gay and aware of it at a young age helped me learn quickly the harshness the real world could be. I learned to have a thick skin. I learned to adapt to my environments. To become a chameleon. All tools that helped me maneuver the world acutely as an adult.
What is one piece of advice you would offer a teenager growing up today? I would say, don’t be afraid to be who you are. The world is a much different place now. Less scary. But most of all learn your history! Educate yourself of the people who came before you and honor their legacies. Too many young people today have no clue how hard it was for some of us. And they take for granted the privileges they have now.
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